And More Bank of America

Forget the financial windfall. Yet another letter came today from Ms. Shari Fauntleroy, Payment Services, at Bank of America Card Services. She never responded to my previous letter, the one addressed to her by name, and there's no phone number to get in touch with her personally, so I'm thinking she's a computer. On May 12, she spit out another letter to me informing me that yet another payment was stopped, and I'm being charged yet another $29 fee.

As luck would have it, I also got my statement, which is more than $100 more than my loan and now has another past due amount and a ten-dollar fee (for?), both of which are impossible, since this is supposed to be automatically debited from my checking account.

Today, I called Jay Jacobs and left another message that went something like this:

"Hello, it's me. You were supposed to call me on Wednesday, but I called you Friday because you hadn't. Then you were supposed to call me Tuesday, but I waited and waited and waited. Now I'm calling you a week later because I received yet another letter [yadda yadda yadda] and yet another statement [yadda yadda yadd], and I'm sick of this! It is ruining my life! I don't understand how a bank can be so FUCKING incompetent! I am suing this bank! If I don't hear from you today, my lawyer will be on this tomorrow!"

If I had the $10,000 to pay off this loan, I would go into the bank tomorrow, pay it, and make a huge display of removing every single penny in every single account.

("All day long I'd ditty ditty boom, if I were a wealthy man.")