U.S. Out of Us

In his sermon at Beth El, Rabbi Schwartz recounted a biblical tale. An ailing rabbi lay suffering in his bed. In another room, ten of the congregation's elders prayed for his recovery. The ailing rabbi's nurse watched the suffering man and prayed for death to end his misery, but the ten elders' prayers were stronger. Outside, the Angel of Death waited, unable to enter because of the prayers. The nurse, desperate for her charge to rest in peace, threw an urn out the window. The noise shattered the concentration of the chanting elders, whose prayers paused for just a moment. The Angel of Death was at last able to enter the home and take the rabbi.

In Jewish law, one mustn't do anything to hasten death. But neither must one stand in death's way by unnatural means. The powerful prayers of the congregation's ten elders were keeping the soul of a long-suffering man--a man who's pain they could not see, for they were in another room--from passing to a peaceful place. The nurse was not hastening death; rather, she was removing the obstacle from its path.

After fifteen long years, Terri Schiavo's obstacle to death has been removed--again.

No fan of the court of public opinion, I don't care that more than 80% of Americans polled would not want to live in what is being called a "persistant vegetative state," that for them, as for me, death would be a welcome angel. Because what we would want is not the point.

Likewise, what God would want is not the point, either. In fact, it would seem he wanted Terri Schiavo in February of 1990, when she was resuscitated after suffering a heart attack brought on by a bulimia-induced potassium deficiency.* But even if it were about what God would want-- which would require that the U.S. draft a new constitution joining church with state--could a federal judge determine God's will?

What this is about, however, is what Terri would want. And therein lies the struggle. Her parents, the Schindlers, believe she would have wanted to remain in her current state indefinitely; her husband does not.**

Florida courts, the most pro-life courts in the country, have thrice ruled that the feeding tube should be removed, that Schiavo's husband had proven he knew his wife's wishes, that the doctors hired by the husband, as well as disinterested doctors hired by the court, had proven to them that Terri's cognitive functions could never be restored.***

As a wife and a daughter, I would find it painful--excruciating--to let my husband or one of my parents die this way. But I know what they want. I know my husband, unable to engage in political discourse or even form an intelligible word, would wish to have no feeding tube or respirator installed. I would have to be unselfish enough to carry out his wishes. I would have to put away my mountains of hope. And as much as it would pain me, I would have to fight anyone who forced me to do other than his will.

His brother, who lived with him the first sixteen years of his life, might think he is a better judge than I of what my husband would want. But I, having lived with him for the past twenty-one years, know better. And I am my husband's surrogate, as is Terri's husband hers. This is not, as Tom DeLay says, a question of the sancity of marriage vs. the sanctity of life. His grandstanding and sloganeering do nothing but shift attention from the facts. You can't shame state laws into changing themselves.

And now the flipside. As a mother, I can understand how the Schindlers must feel, too; I can imagine the hold that hope has on them. Should I ever have to make a decision like this, I would have to decide what my daughter would want and again abandon selfishness. But the fact is, if my baby girl were a married woman, the decision might not be in my hands.

Both sides come from a compelling place.

But, as this is not my child, my wife, I can only respond as an appalled American. I find it terrifying that a Christian-controlled Congress, with the help of some misguided democrats, has passed an unprecedented and likely unconstitutional private law. Conservative Republicans have long argued for government to stay out of our personal lives, yet throughout the Bush presidency, the Religious Wrong has unfolded a cot and stuck it smack dab in the middle of our homes, our wallets, our institutions, and our hospital rooms.

This country is full of Terri Schiavos. Thousands of people decide, daily, whether a life should continue based on individual beliefs and circumstances. This should never have become an argument about the value of human life. Terri Schiavo's case has no parallel with that of a baby who should be allowed to starve to death simply because it can't eat on its own. It's a faulty analogy, a slippery slope; it's dozens of logical fallacies. This is a state's rights issue, and conservative republicans--those advocates against the nanny state--are hypocrites for supporting such a move.

I don't know what to do with Terri Schiavo, and I am glad it is not my decision. But I know what not to do with her, and that is to subject her to anyone's so-called moral agenda by calling in the feds.

The moral of this story, and of Rabbi Schwartz's sermon, is to leave written instructions, preferably in the form of a living will. Unfortunately, we might now have to worry that our own wishes could still be circumvented by people who have no business involving themselves in them. Because what it really boils down to is that right-to-life groups don't want us to have the option.

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For more information on Terri and her case, including a timeline and links to legal records, this seems to be an unbiased account with excellent links.

* I wonder how many people on the front lines of this battle know how Terri came to be in the hospital in the first place.

**Talk of Michael Schiavo's ulterior motives is probably worth examining. Some say he abused his wife, but hospital records all show brusing consistent with potassium deficiency (yes, it causes bruising, cramping, and even heart attacks!). Besides, had he been an abusive husband, he'd never have been invited to live with the Schindlers in their home following the heart attack. As for his new family, how many lives should have stopped for those fifteen years? Regarding the money, no one will ever know the truth except the people in the room.

*** That Terri's condition will never improve is debated only by a few of the Schindler's hires and by people who have done little more than view the same few seconds of file footage. The Schnindler's priest told NBC news yesterday that Terri seemed to form a slight smile. Did she? Or did he want her to and imagine she did?